Hear ye! Hear ye! Here’s me!

This will be the first of many posts, so how’s it going? For my first post I’ve decided to delve into a highly controversial subject. That’s right. You guessed it. Mall Ninjas!

Now if you don’t know what a Mall Ninja is welcome to the club. Even I’m not really sure but nevertheless I’ll try to explain. To my understanding a Mall Ninja is a person that runs around the mall dressed in the latest and greatest tactical clothing. I’m not sure where the ninja part comes from but I’m also not sure where quinoa comes from. Now I’ll admit I own a few pair of cargo pants and a kickass 5.11 tactical jacket. Does that make me a Mall Ninja? Some would say yes. Now in my experience the person most likely to call someone a mall ninja is pretty easy to spot. Here’s the traits they usually have in common.

OLD (at least 45, yeah I know that’s not old)
LOVE 1911’s (I do too old man, let’s be friends)
LOVE FLANNEL (old people can be hipsters too)
USED TO TALK BAD ABOUT “PLASTIC” GUNS (now they all carry one)

So now kind reader that we’ve established a few commonalities amongst the Mall Ninja Accusers let’s move on to why they dislike Mall Ninjas. There are tons of reasons to dislike someone younger, maybe prettier, possibly more educated, probably better trained, and infinitely better at using the Internet so you can’t defend yourself. But through minutes of research I’ve figured out the number one reason. So dear reader, let the TactPunk teach you something. They hate Mall Ninjas because they figured out what it took older peeps years and years to grasp. Gone are the days of a bolt-action rifle for big game and a 12 gauge shotgun for everything else. Companies market to MN (Mall Ninjas, I got tired of typing it) because MN BUY PRODUCTS! Everyone knows someone who’s had the same rifle for 30 years and has never seen a reason to buy a new one.

Gaston Glock hasn’t built his mansions and screwed his family out of money because of those people, he’s done it by making great products that people want. A .380 for summertime carry, a 9mm for when it turns cold, and a .45ACP for 2 legged creatures that go bump in the night.

In conclusion don’t hate the MNs. Talk to them. They’re the future Tier 1 Operators, the future gun designers, the future of the industry we know and love. And MNs, please, try to be a little less annoying it’ll help your cause.


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